New year, same delusional self.
Specifically, I once again am heading into Oscars weekend thinking maybe, just maybe, this year’s telecast will be good. Fun to watch, even. Dare we dream so big?
For starters, while I’ve always been a fan of Jimmy Kimmel as the show’s emcee—maybe more of a fan than most—Conan O’Brien taking the reins has the potential for an unexpected jolt of madcap quirk that such a relentlessly, pompously self-serious ceremony needs. O’Brien is well-liked in the industry and has a long showbiz history, which gives him the experience to know what the crowd wants to see—and the right to take the absolute p--- out of it.
Plus, the show hasn’t even started and he already seems to be having a blast:
Producers also seem to have an eye towards giving the people what they want, which, if rumors are true, is Wicked stars Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo’s first live TV performance together of songs (or a song) from the movie. Given the amount of hype online/in my living room for this, the backlash would be violent if it doesn’t happen. I would Postmates a grocery store’s worth of tomatoes to the Dolby Theatre for attendees to hurl at everyone involved with the telecast if we don’t get this moment.
It’s also going to be juicy to observe what’s happening off-stage, as scandal-ridden Emilia Pérez star Karla Sofía Gascón will reportedly be in attendance. It will mark her return to award season after basically being banished once bigoted past tweets resurfaced, setting up an “I’m back!” moment worthy of a soap opera’s season finale.
How much interaction will she have with her Emilia Pérez co-stars, who have had to distance themselves from her in order to salvage their own awards hopes? Will she do red carpet interviews (which would be insane of her, but amazing for my own personal enjoyment of messiness)? Will her historic nomination be celebrated? She is the first openly trans actor to be nominated, something that would inevitably have gotten a special tribute during the telecast had this controversy not happened. Will she be acknowledged? Heck, will the Emilia Pérez backlash be acknowledged at all?
It has been a juicy delight as someone far too obsessed with all of this to watch this movie plummet from a film that must have been reviewed by critics in a cinema with a toxic gas leak at European festivals, where it inexplicably received raves, to one that the rest of the public has watched and realized is absolute hot garbage.
Because of the early buzz, it received the most nominations at this year’s Academy Awards, with 13. Now it has so much ill-will that people wonder if even the categories that it was considered a shoo-in to win, like Best Original Song, Best International Feature, and Best Supporting Actress (for Zoe Saldaña) are in jeopardy.
That last upset would be the biggest shock, but also amazing television: Running in second place to Saldaña is likely Ariana Grande for her work in Wicked. This woman couldn’t get through a three-minute junket interview about Wicked without bursting into tears. Could you imagine her reaction to winning a surprise Oscar?
The Emilia Pérez storyline has also upended the Best Picture race, making this a rare occasion where the winner don’t seem preordained—injecting the show with some much-needed excitement.
With Emilia Pérez no longer a true contender to win Best Picture (giving me faith that God is real, and he loves me), early frontrunner The Brutalist has a chance to reclaim its spot. Or Anora, which has had a late-season surge of major guild wins, could ride that momentum to a win. Or maybe those movies will split votes, leaving room for the widely beloved—and far more widely seen—Conclave, A Complete Unknown, or Wicked to take it.
Also experiencing a late-season boost is A Complete Unknown star Timothée Chalamet. I both look forward to and fear the complete, hysterical internet meltdown should he win Best Actor, which would make him the youngest actor yet to win the award, and the first Internet Boyfriend to do so. (Fun fact: The former holder of the youngest record is The Brutalist’s Adrien Brody, Chalamet’s biggest competition.)
In Best Actress, while at this point it’s hard to imagine The Substance’s Demi Moore not carrying her golden run across the finish line, all the non-Emilia Pérez nominees are so likable and so excellent that it would be hard to begrudge a surprise in that category either. And if Moore does take the trophy, that will be a great TV moment, too. Her speeches have been excellent, and I can’t wait to hear what she’d say on the Oscar stage.
Listen, I’m going to have to watch this sure-to-be endless telecast regardless, so I at least want it to be good. Finally, there’s hope that it actually could be.
