Stephen Colbert mocked President Trump’s new bid to distance himself from the scandal surrounding sex offender Jeffrey Epstein—by inviting a sex offender to the White House.
The Late Show host on Thursday skewered President Trump’s Oval Office rollout of a rebooted Presidential Fitness Test. “To promote the new test, Trump also had a couple of big-time men’s football players with him,” he said, including “troubled former Giants linebacker Lawrence Taylor.”
“Oh, an important side note: Taylor is also a registered sex offender,” Colbert said.
Former New York Giants linebacker Taylor, 65, pleaded guilty in 2011 to sexual misconduct and patronizing a prostitute, and has twice been charged with failing to update his address on Florida’s sex offender registry, most recently in July 2024.
After the audience booed, Colbert continued: “Mr. President, that is a brilliant way to distance yourself from the whole Epstein scandal.”
“‘I fully renounce everything Jeff did, ’cause now I’m hanging out with a completely different registered sex offender, and we’re just here to make sure our teenagers are very fit,’” Colbert said, impersonating Trump.
Trump’s ceremony on Thursday was meant to spotlight youth health, yet even Taylor seemed baffled when asked why he had been asked to come along.
“I don’t know why. I don’t know what we’re supposed to be doing, but I’m here to serve, and I’m here to serve you,” he told the president, who had also invited Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker and golfer Bryson DeChambeau.
Colbert’s barb arrived amid a very personal grudge match. CBS’ parent company pulled the plug on his late-night show just days after it paid Trump $16 million to settle a lawsuit—sparking Senate questions about a “secret side deal” and prompting the president to gloat, “I absolutely love that Colbert got fired.”
Colbert highlighted how Trump’s Taylor stunt coincides with growing MAGA unrest over the promised—but still unreleased—“Epstein Files.”
Earlier this month, Trump begged supporters to “move on,” but—to his frustration—the matter remains very much alive.
Colbert also joked that Trump was not the best person to bring into law any kind of fitness test for others.
He said: “Today, he signed an executive order to revive the presidential fitness test for American schoolchildren. Yeah, which means now children will have to be as fit as the president.
“‘All right, everyone. Hop on that golf cart and start poppin’ nuggets until your ankles swell like a balloon full of chilli!
“And dip! And munch! And dip and munch! And now, okay, everybody, now watch TV and yell, yell, yell!’”
The Daily Beast has contacted the White House for comment.
